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Showing posts from 2019

Middle Age: Where I Actually Go Blind

I'm scared I won't be able to see when I'm 50.  If I make it to 50.

I've always had poor vision, especially in my right eye.  My misshapen head grew disproportionately on the right side, so my eye sockets elongated....blah blah blah.  I'm functionally blind without glasses.  Have been since I was 8.

I learned to deal with it.  I wore glasses reliably through all of my school (including college) and finally got a set of Toric contact lenses when I was 21, and I was had actual peripheral vision until I dispensed with the contacts around age 32.  They were just too much trouble.

Fast forward to last year.  Thirty nine years old, and "Wow, you have a HUGE cataract!" I'd noticed I had zero depth perception, and I increasingly just could not see at work.  The last straw was a trip to KY where driving at night was, well, a nightmare.   My eye dominance was effectively 95% left and 5% right.  The Opthamologist was almost gleeful; I'd need surgery to repla…

Time is a Pretty Pony, with a Wicked Heart

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So, I made some rocks for my daughters' rock ceremony last night.


The left, JOY, is for Grace (all-caps intentional) and the right Perseverance is for Maria.  Then today, I got the "memory" of the rocks last year.


That was exactly 364 days ago (Understanding == Maria, Enthusiasm == Grace).  As cliche as it sounds, it really seems like yesterday.  I'm reminded of reading the Stephen King short story My Pretty Pony.  The summary seems apt:

The man also "gives instruction" on the nature of time: how when you grow up, it begins to move faster and faster, slipping away from you in great chunks if you don't hold tightly onto it. Time is a pretty pony, with a wicked heart. Another year.  I've hardly written, despite being a much changed man from a year ago.

Last summer was our last with Joey.  As I write this, he's to graduate on Saturday,  enlisted in the Army and moving with his father to Alabama before that.  I did enjoy having him with us durin…

Things I Really Wish I Knew about LOVE

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Having just ended my second trip through The Five Love Languages by Dr. Chapman, there are things I really wish I could get through my thick skull.

Apropos: We just got through Valentine's Day and the occasion seems right.

1. Being "In Love"Ends I remember my friend Dannah my freshman year.  She was one of the strongest women I'd ever met.  She had the grit and determination of her military dad, a sharp wit, and a heart as big as Dayton, Ohio.  But there was one thing.

Dannah was terrified that her hometown beau, Tom, was going to "fall out of love with her."  They'd been in love for years, and with distance and experience, it seemed like that ooey-gooey feeling of "love" was going to stop.

Well...it did.  The thing idiots like us didn't realize was: IT ALWAYS STOPS.

Chapman argues in his book that the "in love" feeling that consumes you and spackles over every bump in your relationship might last about 2 or so years on average. …